When you smile, my heart aches...

My heart is at a stage where I can't tell right from wrong anymore.. I'm in pain.. I make people in pain.. Sometimes I miss the old time.. Sometimes I wish the time could fly by faster.. I'm very easy to please.. But I also ask for to much...
How can someone accept me when I can't even accept myself? I'm aching..
My future is based on the decisions I make.. There's one decision that will determine my whole entire life.. I can't go back once I've decided.. I'm scared of the outcome..